Right now I'm sporting a pretty nice looking little bruise in the
webbing of my thenar space. Its presence is attributed to an ill-fated attempt at putting up an event tent the other night. And while the bruise is physically what is staying with me, what is mentally staying with me are the thoughts that resulted from the situation.
Being one of a few attempting to put the tent up I was using all of my might to aid in the process, only to find our combined efforts to not be very mighty. As a result, the aforementioned webbing ended up getting severely pinched between two of the tent pieces. While I tried to free my hand I frantically looked around with pleading eyes for someone to help me, for surely they were seeing the predicament (and pain) I was in! Weren't they?! Once I realized that no one was paying me any attention I refocused myself wholeheartedly on trying to set myself free, for surely I could take care of this all on my own! Couldn't I?! Nope. Okay, back to beckoning people in with my wide-eyed looks of desperation. . .After a good 45 seconds or so (which nearly seemed like an eternity) I finally decided to vocally ask for help, which, surprise surprise, led to a very quickly freed hand.
Why didn't I just call out for help from the get go? Why did I assume that people would just know through osmosis or something that I was needing their assistance? Even more so, in life in general, how often do we wait around, hoping that others will see our needs, our hurt, and our pain without us having to tell them? How often do we try and take care of things by ourselves that in fact require the help of others? Why is it difficult for us to convey our needs, to ask for help, when we most need to? Don't we realize that if we speak up things will start heading in the right direction, if not get better, a heck of a lot faster? Or, if nothing else, at least we will have the support of others?
Nearly immediately after being rescued from the attacking tent, a phrase from Bill Withers' song "Lean on Me" came to mind, it goes: "For no one can fill those of your needs that you don't let show." How true. Sometimes people can sense when something is wrong, when someone needs something, but for the most part that is rare, especially since we've all gotten pretty good at hiding what's really going on with us. If we expect others to help us we have to open up ourselves to them, we have to invite them in, vocally, we have to swallow our pride. It may be a little frightening or out of our comfort zone but in so doing we allow ourselves to get the aid, care, support, and true friendship that we need. After all, we ALL need someone to lean on.
"Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on
If there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road
I'll share your load
If you just call me
So just call on me brother, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean on."
